newme50

That last stubborn , sticky pound is gone. I have reached my first mini-goal. 41 pounds are gone for good. I almost didn’t make it this week because I cheated on the exercise. I skipped the gym for the whole week. That’s a lesson learned. It was too stressful watching the needle on the scale NOT going down. I’m setting my next mini-goal a lot closer. That was tough.

I sure can….it’s that last pound before I hit my first mini-goal , and it’s wrapped around my midsection and attached like superglue! I don’t know why I set my mini-goal at 41 pounds….now that just defies logic. 1 pound in the difference and I could have been there , right now ,today , basking in the sweet smell of success. Instead I am here grumbling and cursing that last stinking pound. It better be gone by morning when I weigh in!
I’m actually doing ok. I resisted a Cadbury creme egg yesterday, a pizza the day before , and had a bottle of water today while my hubby scarfed down a hotdog and a coke, so I’m patting myself on the back for that much. I did however skip the gym all week. Yeah….the dog was sick ,and dadadada ……( insert excuses) and ….truth is , I just got lazy, and that’s why this week , instead of reaching that mini-goal , I only took off 1 pound so far , and have 1 more stinking pound to go. No one to blame but myself. *sigh*….back to the treadmill for me.

Rough day yesterday. It was too cold to go outside. I know , that sounds like an excuse , but I really HATE the cold , and am getting disgusted with this long winter! The gym was closed, the stores were closed, and I was just plain bored. I couldn’t get interested in my novel. I cooked the Easter ham because we’ll be out visiting today and likely tomorrow, and it was calling to me all day. I made scalloped potatoes too. Surely I had enough self control by now to just have a small serving. Whoa boy…. I don’t know how many pounds of grapes I ate trying to keep away from those scalloped potatoes. They smelled sooo good. About an hour before supper I filled a bowl with spinach and mushrooms. I knew if I didn’t do something I was going to pig out big time on those potatoes. I got through the day , and managed to eat only a small serving of ham and potatoes, but it was a monumental struggle the whole day. I’m getting out of the house today for sure, and getting some exercise, even if I freeze my tookus off. I have a couple of pounds of grapes to work off now! I’m really going to have to work hard this week….I still had my glass of wine….ok …2 glasses of wine…with dinner, so I’ll have to be extra vigilent this coming week. The wine was so worth it. The leftover potatoes I may have to feed to the dog , so they stop calling my name. (there’s no onions in them , so they are safe for the dog) Hmmmm wonder why the vet says he’s gaining weight. Happy Easter everyone! Good Luck with your battles with the Easter Bunny. Thank goodness there wasn’t any chocolate in the house! I would have been too weak to resist. I’m going to have to work on my strategy for combatting boredom. Looks like that is my weak point. Yeah…I know I was lazy too. I could have done exercises in the house, and I didn’t , but that seemed boring too. I need to engage my mind when I’m having a day like that. I’ll work on it. If I don’t boredom is going to be my downfall.

Since I can’t seem to do it for myself, I’m doing it for Marge. Everytime I log on and see Marge (one of my buddies) I’m drinking a glas of water. Everytime I read a blog or comment of hers, I’m drinking a glass of water. Maybe making a game of it will work! I’m not drinking enough water otherwise. Heres to you Marge!

I like my special occasions to “feel” special , so for Holidays and birthdays I include a special treat, maybe a dessert, or a bottle of good red wine, and that helps make it different from every other day. It’s been working well. I limit it to that day only. I had cake for my birthday…for those of you that know me, you know I also tried to make a good choice by using angel food cake with light cool whip and berries, and now for Easter, we will share a nice bottle of wine. This is going to be a long journey and I want to keep things as normal as possible, and to still have things to look forward to. I’ve been looking forward to this bottle of wine since my birthday in February! I didn’t invite anyone for Easter this year. Family holidays have always been focussed on huge amounts of food and drink and I just won’t buy into that this year. Maybe I’ll be ready for it next year , but we will not have 4 different kinds of pie and enough food to feed an army! I’ll start a new tradition. This journey is too new right now , and I’m not ready to get caught up in making the big family dinner. My husband and I plan to visit family, and spend some quiet time at home alone. If the damned snow ever stops , we’ll go for a long walk. (May still need my long johns) Where the heck is spring anyway???!!! I’m still losing steadily. I weigh in tomorrow….have 39 pounds off as of today….hoping the scale will give me one more teensie pound by tomorrow…but if not , that’s ok too. I’m only 2 pounds away from my first mini goal. Whew….set that one too far away. The next one will be closer. 41 pounds was pretty big for my first goal. It’s nice to be so close to it. I’ll soon have to get more clothes again. DH was laughing at my clown pants yesterday, I’m looking more like Mr. BoJangles every day now. I’ll still having trouble drinking water. I don’t know why I seem to have a mental block. I do ok for a few days , and then “forget” to drink water , and go days before I realize I’ve slipped back. I guess that’s going to be my biggest struggle, to change that habit permanently. Anyway, ciao for now. Hope you all have a fun Easter!

It was too nice a day to stay home , so mom and I took off to shop. We’re both plus size, so go to the same stores. Funny thing was , in one of the stores they had this little tiny, petite woman waiting on us. I found it odd , because most stores selling plus sizes hire big girls. Gotta make us feel at home ! …Anyway ,I was trying to decide on which size shirt to get, and we got talking about weight loss. I told her I was losing weight , so was better off buying one a little snug , rather than a little loose. She agreed , and started talking about shopping when she was losing weight. We talked about second hand stores, sales and not buying any more than one or two things at a time , because of changing size and shape. I was getting really curious , because frankly, I may have eaten snacks bigger than her, so I boldly asked her how much she had lost. Over 100 pounds!!!!
She used to be a middle plus size. OMG. It was amazing. She looked like she was naturally skinny. I would never have guessed in a million years that she had ever been anything but a toothpick. Wow. We CAN some day walk amongst the masses undetected. We will be able to blend in with the regular size people , and they’ll never know. They’ll tell us fat jokes and never know why we’re glaring at them! *lol*
It was fun meeting a success story face to face.
Another fun thing about today was that my mom, my sister and I are all big , but I was always 2 or 3 sizes bigger than they were. Well, not any more. We’re all the same size now. My sister is going to freak when my mother tells her we bought the same shirt today, in the same size! It was a proud moment.

I found these great baked pita chips in Ranch , Pesto , BBQ and plain by “Uncle George” I carefully read the label on the ranch flavour and was pleasantly surprised to see that there were  130 calories in a 28g serving, which stated on the bag as being 30 chips. Now these were a nice size, good and crunchy, so I figured they were a great way to satisfy a craving for something a bit salty and crunchy, rather than potato chips. I have been using these as a snack food , and I don’t know why , but I glanced at my bag of BBQ flavour today and it said 130 calories for a 28g serving which is 17 chips. !!!!! not 30!!!!! Uncle George cannot be trusted! I’m going to email him and ask him what gives. I still have the empty old bag , because I was going to show it to my sister , so she could get some too. Not another chip until Uncle George and I get a few things straight.! Sheesh….when I was being so darn careful, counting out 30 chips so as to not waste a lot of calories on a snack food. I was wondering why my weight loss slowed down. I was probably eating twice as many calories as I thought in my snack food!!!

My Doctor was the one that suggested it, because my weight is dropping so fast. She shops at Frenchy’s (a great used clothing store here that even has a lot of stuff with the tags still on it , and good brand name clothing) .Off I went yesterday to buy more clothes that fit. It was great fun. Some of the things I bought were NOT in the plus size section! That was a first. I think I’ll make a visit there once a month as I shrink. It’s too expensive to buy new clothes every month, and I feel better in clothes that fit. I started rounding up some clothes to donate. I’ll only keep 1 shirt and 1 pair of “fat” pants to remind me of how far I’ve come. It’s a rainy day , so no walking today. I’ll likely just do some free weights and resistance bands here in the house. Maybe even put on a tape and do some aerobics. I don’t go to the gym on Saturdays , because it’s too busy. don’t care for the crowds. Have a good weekend!

I thought I’d take a few minutes to look at changing behaviors. This really hit home the other day when I got upset by my boss at work. My usual behavior was to get a large chocolate bar , or large cappuchino and swallow my feelings…all that anger, frustration and hurt turned inward on myself. Without even thinking , this time was different. I grabbed my water bottle and sweater and stomped around the parking lot muttering to myself , getting out all the frustration and anger until I calmed down. I got it out of my system , got some exercise , and didn’t punish myself. It was a real “aha” moment. I also was a big unconscious eater. Sitting watching T.V. or at the computer , munching away until the bag of chips or whaever was gone. I still do some unconscious eating, but I’m popping grapes , not chips or nuts. I eat oatmeal or bran buds most mornings, sometimes an egg. These foods seem to stay with me until lunch time. I’m big on planning my meals now , and that helps. I also go to the store every 2 -3 days to make sure I’m well stocked on the freshest , most appealing fruits and vegetables. I have upped my seafood intake. I eat more fish and shellfish. Its easy to stretch out shrimp in a big stir “fry”…more steamed than fried actually. I now substitute splenda for sugar and applesauce for oil in my baking. It really works! I pay attention to serving sizes listed on packages. If it says 200 calories , and that sounds good , check the serving size…if it’s for 1/2 a frozen pizza that’s great, if it’s for a 1/6 that will be about 3 inches wide , not so good. This happens a lot on packaging. What you assume is a serving size often is about 2-4 times what they list. When I incease my water intake the pounds fall off. I have a hard time with water, but I notice it really makes a huge difference. I swear when I drink lots I pee out pounds. My attitude has changed. I used to think about food all the time, I used to crave food, and get soo hungry I had to stop at the candy machine. I think I had my blood sugar all messed up. I was going up and down on a sugar roller coaster….a burst of energy , and then a few hours later, so exhausted and hungry I did it all over again. Alcohol was a big culprit for me. I would have a few beer when I got home from work to relax, a few drinks on the weekend….sugar high, sugar low, and it was ruining my sleep. I would wake up tired , dehydrated , and stop for a cinnamon bun and cappucino to jump start my day. I am on so much more an even keel now. I feel rested , and food is becoming a fuel. I still enjoy my food , but thinking about it does not consume me. I was not getting enough fibre at first , so have increased that, and take fish oil . My overall mood, and energy level has increased dramatically. I treat myself with other things now….new clothes, magazines,new hair colour, or style. I use all my resources. I have my buddyslim support group, the support of my husband, my family, my co-workers all know , so I’m less likely to slip up around them. I read weight loss articles in magazines , and on the net. I take out books from the library on heathly eating. I eat yogurt sweetened with splenda daily, and calorie reduced hot chocolate for a treat in the evenings. I try to walk extra at work. I’ll make extra trips up and down the stairs, instead of trying to carry everything at once. I try to move more when I’m sitting around. I have resistance bands that I’ll use while watching T.V. , or I’ll use some free weights. I have ankle weights that I’ll strap on when I’m doing housework. Every little bit helps! That’s enough typing. My butts getting flat. These things are old hat to most of you, but there might be something in my ramblings that will help someone. It also helps me to think about the changes I’m making. It really is about lifelong changes in attitude and behavior. I think it was Dee that put it so well with S.T.A.N.D.We should be both comfortable in our own skin and keep striving to improve. Negativity is our biggest downfall. Staying positive will help us stay the course.

Woohoo…It feels like a graduation! I finally stumbled on how to upload a picture. This one is temporary until I get one of myself loaded. This is pretty exciting for a old gal like me. I am not very computer literate.